The list 2009*

All over the TV there are shows about the best and worst of 2009 so in grand tradition of American TV I have hereupon this blog made my official list of things I NEVER thought I would hear or say which occurred during 2009 (drum roll please)

# 10 "Nobody better spit on anybody else in this car, and that includes the frogs."(during a ride to Parker December 24th)
# 9 "If you don't want to hear it shut your ears." (same car ride)
# 8 "Who is torturing the cat out there?" (Phoenix singing with Halo)
# 7 "Do you have an all-day Valium lollipop?" (Asked at the dental appointment for Phoenix after his tooth extraction)And YES they offered his brother a sucker after the appointment, now that's job security!
# 6 "Nobody here has any spare candy, It is Halloween." (In my defense I had been freezing my tush off in the snow behind my trunk for a long time with wet boots and Dakota wanted any "spare" candy for his enormously full giant bucket)
# 5 "Of course we are all here, does anyone appear gone?" (brain death from talking to children for too long)
# 4 "If either of you touch each other ever again, I'll kill you both." (from beyond brain death during a fight over who touched who)
# 3 "Phoenix is looking out of my window again" (every car ride, air space counts to a 4 year old)
# 2 "Why are you scared of the basement? I am the scariest thing in the basement, now go down there and get me a Kleenex." OK so I wasn't IN the basement just then.

AND the # 1 quote from 2009 "If you shoot anyone else in the face, I will take back all your Christmas presents to Santa and kill you both."
Actual quote from Brittany to Dakota Christmas Eve after he shot Phoenix in the face with a pellet gun. The present thing got his attention, you did not even scare him with the death threats!